So, I went to a bunch of fashion shows this week and I saw this one guy around a lot- clearly straight, clearly not in the business and clearly scoping out the chicks. By the third time I saw him, I was curious about him, so I introduced myself. He told me that a PR friend of his, hooked him up so he could come to the shows because he wants to meet a woman to date. She told him that there would be a ton of pretty ones out and about during fashion week. I asked him how it was going (of course, after I told him that today was his lucky day because I was a matchmaker and that he should forget fashion shows, and realize I was the one who was holding the keys to the kingdom he is looking for!)
He said that, of course, there were tons of pretty girls, who might be available and who might want a guy but that they didn’t act that way at all. I looked him up and down- definitely a hot guy, definitely a successful looking guy- he had a white gold Rolex Daytona watch, a crisp white shirt, a Brioni cashmere blazer, a nice Camel overcoat, and supple leather gloves- he looked like a catch. These women are idiots, I thought immediately. He made a joke and said that it would be good if I could pass along some advice to the fashionistas so that in the future they wouldn’t miss a great guy like him standing right in front of them…
No problem!!! Clearly, the fashionistas are doing something wrong! Clearly they are giving off the wrong vibe! And it’s ironic because all I hear all the time, from all the fashion girls how difficult it is to meet a good guy. They constantly complain that they get to go to the coolest parties (their opinion) but all the men in attendance are gay or married so they wind up beautiful and alone because they can’t meet anyone. They say they see the same people all the time, and they say that their friends have already set them up with everyone they know. Then they beg me to set them up with someone great and straight!
The funny thing is these girls say they are dying to meet someone but then a guy like my client (yes, he signed up yesterday) comes around, a good looking guy (he really does look like Robert Downey Jr) , a successful guy, (he does make 7 figures) and an honest to goodness heterosexual guy and they ignore him or just don’t see him. So, here’s some advice for the fashionistas who claim that they would love to meet a great guy but never do so, for the girls who will be spending Valentine’s Day with another fashionista admiring their wardrobes and their photos on Wireimage instead of dining with an eligible guy at Gilt or Country…
1. Keep in mind that even at an event where most of the men are gay or unavailable there might always be that one guy who isn’t- and it only takes one.
2. Keep in mind that pretty girls are desired by men but are also intimidating to men; even to the most confident of men. Don’t stand in packs- just stand with one friend or alone so he will be able to approach if he wants to.
3. If a guy seems like he wants to approach, use body language, even just a smile to let him know that its okay to do so
4. Keep in mind that just because you are pretty doesn’t mean that guys are going to like you, you need to be welcoming and pretty.
5. Always be aware of your surroundings, because you never know who might be sitting next to you who might be a contender….
6. Do an honest self assessment and make an honest determination if the fashionista you is scaring away or turning off the men? Do you look too expensive and that makes a guy, any guy think you will be too high maintenance to handle?
7. Do you look untouchable because you are so decked out that it looks like if they lay a finger ron you, you will freak, break or get mussed? This is not good for dating.
8. Keep in mind that there is a time to be a fashion plate (the shows are a good time for that) and a time to be an attractive and also approachable woman (when you are specifically going out to meet men), make sure you dress accordingly for each occasion.
9. No more excuses about how you have to dress a certain way for your image; your image is fine. If meeting a man or getting married is a priority to you right now, you might have to tone down the designer duds in pursuit of love.